I believe I have misnamed one of my darling little bottle babies. She has this sweet little girly name, but little did I know what her personality was truly like until after she destroyed two baby monitors. She has a vocal range that is unreal in one so young. I’m just thankful there is no glass in our barn and that the house sets a good distance away. I seriously would fear for the windows. We also now keep all vehicles a safe distance away from the barn. And, I have warned visitors with eyeglasses to be on the alert in case my sweet little girl cuts loose with her rendition of, "You’d better feed me or else!"

She started out normal, as normal as any bottle baby can be, until she realized she really and truly loved that bottle. Then she discovered she had a voice. From that day on she practiced hitting high notes, low notes, middle notes, notes never known by humans before. She would have put any male or female opera star to shame with the way she diligently practiced and with range of notes she could hit.

Not long after one of her first practice sessions, I noticed that the baby monitors were acting crazy up at the house. The little girl hit a high note and the speakers just simply blew in them. It was that quick. No smoke from the monitors, they just started coughing and hacking and rattling over the slightest sound. They seemed to tremble in fear whenever my little girl acted like she was going to do the musical scales and particularly all at one time.

Now, we have had plenty of bottle babies before and they all could give a good yell for their bottles, but our dear little Master Blaster (her new name) can out do them all. Even her two bottle companions stand back in awe when she cuts loose. They don’t bother trying to yell that it is supper time because Master Blaster has it covered.

We’ve had loud goats before. We use to raise Nubians and people keep telling me that the Nubian is the loudest most social goat there is. I don’t know about that. I’ve never owned all breeds to compare, only a few different breeds. I will have to admit my Nubians "talked" a lot. I never thought anything about it until some people came to look at our Nubians and the whole herd welcomed them in a chorus of "So good to meet you." The lady commented, "That’s a Nubian for you, always talking."

Sure the Nubians talked a lot. They are very friendly. I could step out of the house and the herd could be way over on the other hill and see me and start hollering, "Good Morning!" Or, "Good Afternoon!" Whichever the case might be.

And, they continually talked to each other. Making comments like, "My, what a pretty butterfly." Or, "Did you see that bird?" Or, "How dare you butt me! Take that! And, that!" And when that lady was making the comment on how the Nubians liked to talk all the time, they were. They had run in to see the new visitors and stood along the fence making comments on the visitors hair, clothes, car. Just a happy, gossipy little group.

So, I’m use to goats talking. I don’t think much about it at all. Just accept it as normal. But, Master Blaster is totally different. For one thing, she is a full blood Boer, not a particularly talky breed of goat. The other thing is her loudness. Totally unreal. The older goats around here cringe when she starts yelling. The other bottle babies run to her because they know Master Blaster gets results.

How so much sound can come out of such a small package is a mystery. The stereo and surround sound people really should come and study her. If they could copy her loudness, her depth of sound, her range and in such a small package, they would never have to worry about competition again. But, until they do and pay my price of a couple of new baby monitors to observer her, I need to go to town to buy some. Maybe I can set them to the back of the barn, away from Master Blaster, and they’ll survive. One can only hope.

THE END