Dear Favorite Relative,
I truly apologize in taking so long to write. I know how you hang onto every word and count the days until my next letter, but I just got so busy running this goat farm. I am surprised though that you did not call or write to remind me that it had been months since my last letter. Ah, well, I figure you realized the importance of the work I was doing and did not want to bother me.
Letís see, a lot has happened. Leeís foot is so much better after his foot surgery. He had to stay off it for at least two weeks before the doctor would allow him to hobble around even a little bit. I truly think the doctor wrapped his foot in a triple layer of bandages to remind me to not take Lee outside and put him to work. Oh my, itís not me making him work. That man just loves to work on this goat farm and when I hand him this new list of things he needs to catch up on, why he is going to be ecstatic.
And, I just know you are worried about whether we are getting our hay in for the winter. Never fear, we are continuously working at it. Why, just last week we put in 551 square bales in the barn. As you know, we go to the field where we buy it and I drive the truck and trailer and Lee loads them up with big square bales. You should have seen that man hobbling along, youíd been proud of him. No matter how much I speeded up, he could really move at a fast gimp and throw those hay bales on the trailer and truck.
Even so, we were working by flashlight late at night to get those bales in. And, yes, we used the hay elevator to put those bales at the top of the barn. I put my foot down, barely missing his, and told Lee the hay elevator was to be used. Him throwing those bales up to the hay loft and then running up to stack the hay was just too much after being laid up with foot surgery. I told him I would place the hay on the hay elevator and then he could stack the hay. Once again, you should have seen him hobble as I hurriedly put bales on that elevator. He can really move when he wants to.
Oh my, recently I had quite a nasty shock when I went out to check on two bucks. When the yearling buck turned to face me, the left eye was so swollen you couldnít tell if he still had an eyeball. And, his bottom eye lid was three fourths of the way torn off. The shock was almost too much for me, but being a goat farmer I am naturally tough. I just hoped the young buck was tough enough to stand what I was going to do to him.
I waited for Lee to get home and we decided to try and put at least one stitch in the bottom eye lid to pull it near the location it should be. I grabbed up the unwaxed floss and a needle and Lee held onto the young buck. The buck stood there like a trooper and let me put the needle and floss through the hanging eye lid, but to reattach it close to the eye, I was sweating bullets so bad I just couldnít do it. So, I held the buck and Lee attached it, but handed it back to me to tie off in a knot. We then filled the eye with Terramycin eye ointment and around all the jagged edges.
Now, why I am going into such detail to tell you what we did is just in case one of your own children rips an eyelid mostly off, youíll know how to repair it. But, alas, after a week when the swelling was going down, we saw we had not stitched it in the right place and a pocket was forming in front of the eye. So, we took the stitch out and grabbed up the trusty super glue.
Well, let me tell you, all super glues are not equal. The first one we tried didnít hold more then a few hours. Then we found one that would hold for a day and a half. Doing the super glue around a moist eye is tricky. You have to do it just in spots so the eye gets a chance to heal, you have to make sure you donít super glue the eye shut, and you have to remember that super glue sticks better to your fingers then it does to damp goat hair. Iím sure my fingers will eventually separate and my typing will get much faster.
Remember that older buck I told you about that was getting extraordinarily mean? After he had knocked Lee through the gate three times, we decided he needed a new home. He now resides in the freezer. You know, revenge can be quite tasty sometimes. Lee said the whole time that buck was chasing him and knocking him through stuff, he kept thinking he was going to be really embarrassed if that buck killed him. Heíd be the only man in our county killed by a buck. So, if you and the family get a chance to drop by, Iíll feed you some tasty billy burgers.
Well, daylightís a burning and Iíve got chores to do.
As always, your favorite relative,