According to the psychologists at Manchester University, everyone needs at least one hug a day to cope with the stress of modern life. Also, they were shocked to discover that one-third of the people in Britain receive no daily hugs at all. Young children get the most hugs, teenagers get the least hugs, and after the age of thirty-five any amount of hugs definitely go swiftly down hill.
You can see why young children get the most hugs. They are adorable and they tend to actually like people. Teenagers get few hugs, well, because they are teenagers. They are usually trying to act more adult than adults and heaven forbid, they are always on guard in case their parents might want to give them a hug. The thirty-five years and older, well face it, we are bossy. We want to make people mind, we also know that our way works the best, and we really do deserve more respect because we have the high dollar credit cards. Except for having the high dollar credit cards, we are simply old prickly teenagers.
So, how on earth are we going to get our quota of hugs a day to handle the stress of modern life? You know my answer to that one. Get a goat! You say goats can’t hug. Oh, on contraire. Why, I was reminded just how huggable they were today. Several of the year old ex-bottle babies ran in from the field when they saw me cleaning out water tubs, begging for a hugging. Several other girls who were not ex-bottle babies came with them to also be hugged and bragged over. They just oozed happiness over the hug. You could feel their gladness that you were in their life. Now, if that isn’t a hug, I don’t know what is.
Even walking among the older does, I’ll have several separate themselves out to come over and say hello and ask for a hugging. A few are old ex-bottle kids, but the main lot are adult does who just enjoy your company and a good petting.
I can’t count the number of times I have stood and talked to visitors and customers with several ex-bottle kids standing around, chewing on the ends of my shirt, looking up at me adoringly. Once again, if that isn’t a goat hug, I don’t know what is. Sure, I tend to have raggedy barn clothes, but it’s well worth it.
So, before you run out and buy any ol’ goat so you can keep up on your quota of hugs a day, there are certain specifications to look for in a huggable goat. A biggie is, it must be tame. Don’t go buy one that is so wild that it runs to the next county if you step out of the house. I don’t think you are fast enough to hug it.
It doesn’t have to be an ex-bottle baby. There are plenty of sweet goats around that actually like and trust people. How can you tell? Once again, if you step into the pen and the goat runs to the next county is a clue that this is definitely not a huggable goat.
Buying a full grown buck is usually not a good idea of a huggable goat. Oh, sure, he may be friendly and all that, but you have to deal with his cologne of ‘Ode of Stinky Buck’. Bucks can be pretty rank smelling, especially since they like to hose themselves down daily to make themselves smell good for the does. Touch a buck and that odor stays with you a looooong time.
Sometimes a buck acts so friendly and mannerly that I can’t help myself and give him a hug. But, you see, it’s all right for me to do this because no one expects me to smell good, I’m a goat farmer. Many times people drive by and see me out standing in the field with my raggedy clothes on and several ex-bottle kids chewing on my shirt tail and as the wind shifts and goes through their open car window, they gasp, “Yep, that’s a goat farmer.” So, remember, you are just someone wanting a pet goat, not to be a goat farmer. You go around hugging bucks and you can kiss any type of human contact good-bye. Unless, of course, you aspire to be a goat farmer like myself.
Thinking about it, my sense of smell has been burned out years ago by the buck smell. Their smell doesn’t bother me any more, because I can’t smell it! So, I have no problem giving our bucks a petting or a hug every now and then. But, even then you have to watch what buck you hug. They can be every bit as prickly as a teen-ager or an adult past the age of thirty-five. So, I’d say forget about buying a buck for your daily hug.
A good ol’ friendly adult doe or wether or ex-bottle kid would be your best bet of giving and receiving plenty of hugs. They don’t care if you aren’t gorgeous or successful or have a brand new car. They just want you to care for them and give them a hug every now and then. And, if you live in an apartment that doesn’t allow goats, I’m sure you could find a goat farmer who would let you visit every now and then, particularly if there is hay to bring in or a barn to clean, and you can hug one of their goats.
So, if you are looking for your very own huggable goat, remember, I am a goat farmer that sells goats, and look for the sign, “Hugs R’ Us”. You can also call me at Br-549. Thank you, thank you very much.
THE END
|