Current
Visitors
25
COVER PAGE
PREVIOUS
DISPLAY
 Related Articles
12 DAYS OF CHRISTMAS
4 H FRETTER-ER
A BUCK GROWS UP
ADAPTING
AGAIN, THE SKY IS FALLING
ALL YOU NEED IS ... CARDBOARD
AMANNAMEDJED
AND THEN IT GOT COLD
AND THEN IT WARMED UP TO ZERO
ANGRY GOAT FARMER
ANTIQUE GOAT FARMING
ANYTHING BUT THAT
ARE BUCKS EVER BABIES
AROMA THERAPY
ARTFUL DODGERS
ARTIC FRONT
AUTUMN BOQUET
B U B - B U B - B U B
BABY BACK EXCUSE
BABY MONITORS
BACK TO NATURE
BAIT
BARKING AT GOATS
BARN SOUR TRUCK
BATTERIES NOT INCLUDED
BE HAPPY
BEAUTY MISTAKES
BEHAVIORS
BEHIND THE GATE
BIG 10-4 GOAT FARMER
BIKINI WEDNESDAYS
BILLBOARD GOAT FARMING
BILLIES & STICKWEEDS
BLIZZARD OF 92
BLONDE GOAT FARMER
BLONDE HUMOR
BOTTLE BABIES
BOTTLE BABY TALK
BOTTLE BABY WITHDRAWAL
BOXING SUNBEAMS
BRONCHITIS.
BRUISE OR DIRT
BUCK LOVE
BUCKETHEAD
BUCKS IN STOCK
CALLING YOOOOU
CAN'T TOUCH THIS
CANE I DO IT?
CARPAL TUNNEL HAY
CATCHING PEARL
CHICK CHICK CHICORY
CHOCOLATE PLUM
CHRISTMAS KIDDING
CHUCK
COLD IS OUR FRIEND NOT
COUGH DROP WORMER
COUNTING
CRUMPLED
CUD CHEWING CONTENTMENT
DAYCATIONS
DEAR FAVORITE RELATIVE
DELOUSED
DOES ANYBODY REALLY KNOW ...
DOES ON KIDDING
DOWNSIZING
DRAMA QUEEN
DRENCHED!
DRESS FOR SUCCESS
DUCT TAPE.
DUMPSTER RAIDERS
EARPUGS
EGG SHELL MASSACRE
EMMITT
EMPTY NEST SYNDROME
EQUIPMENT OPERATORS - DANCERS
ESCAPE ARTIST
ESCORT SERVICE
FALLING SKY
FARM WALK
FARMER C S I
FEEL LIKE A NUT
FIRST IMPRESSIONS
FIRST LINE OF DEFENSE
FIRST YOU TAKE YOUR SOCK
FLOATING MUSHROOMS
FORKS IN THE ROAD
FULL OF BULL
G G
GATE ATTACK !!!!
GIRL WATCHER
GLIDING
GLOBAL SUPPORT CENTER
GNAWED AND BASICALLY CHEWED
GOAT ADDICTION
GOAT CELEBRATIONS
GOAT FARMER SONG
GOAT FARMER WEIGHT TRAINING
GOAT FARMER'S CREED
GOAT FARMING CAMP
GOAT HOLIDAY GIFTS
GOAT HUNTING
GOAT KLEENEX
GOAT LANGUAGE
GOAT OLYMPICS
GOAT PROFILER
GOAT SCIENTIST
GOAT WHEELS
GOAT WRITER
GOATS RULE
GOOD GRIEF
GOT RUNS?
GOTTA WORK KIDS
GRAND CANYON OF CHILDRESS
GREAT KIDDERS
HAULING GOATS
HAVE MILK WILL TRAVEL
HAVEN'T GOT A CLUE
HAY MONITOR
HE-BE-GEE-BE'S
HELP! HELP! HELP!
HELP! I'M IN THE BATHTUB
HELPING HOOVES
HERD OF TURTLES
HERE COMES KIDDING TIME - A CHRISTMAS TUNE
HOBBLE, HOBBLE
HOLIDAY TRADITIONS (A GROANER)
HOME DECORATOR
HORNLESS
HOT CHOCOLATE
HOW TO BUY GOATS
HOW YOU FEELING?
HUGS
HUNDERD YEARS
HUNTING LUMBERJACKS
I APPROVE THIS MESSAGE
I FEEL PRETTY
I PREFER LONG EYE LASHES
I REALLY DO HAVE A HOME
I'LL HOLD HIM BACK
I'M A LITTLE TEAPOT
I'M STILL HERE?
INDIAN SUMMER
INNOCENT 1ST TIME KIDDERS
INTERNET AUCTIONS
INVESTMENTS
IRON WILL
IT TOOK TWO
JINGLE BELL GOATS
JOKE - GET A JOB!
JOYFUL
JUMPY LITTLE SNOWBIRD
JUST 1 MORE GOAT
KEYSTONE KOPS
KID CATCHING
KID IN A BOX
KID SENSORY OVERLOAD
KIDMARES
KNUCKLE SANDWICHES
LADYLIKE BUCK SELLER
LAST BUCK STANDING
LEFT OVERS
LETTERS
LETTERS FROM THE FARM
M. D. GOAT
MAD AGGIE
MANIPULATE WHAT?
MASTER BLASTER
MAYBE THIS TIME
MEMBER ME
MIND CONTROL
MR. SNUFFY
MUSHROOM HUNTING
MUTTER MUTTER
NAMING GOATS
NANNY BERRIES ~ DEAR FAVORITE RELATIVE
NEW "KID" ... SHOWING
NEW HAY IN THE HOUSE
NEW KIDS.
NEW YEAR’S RESOLUTIONS
NORMAL
OCTOBER KIDDING
ODE TO ODOR
OH, MY
OUCH
PANIC ATTACK!
PAW PAWS
PHILOSOPHY OF HYPOCRISY
PHONE CALLS
PHONE CLASS
PICK POCKETS
PIRANHA PEN
PLAYING DEAD
PLEASED AS PUNCH
PLEASING GOAT CUSTOMERS
PLOP
POOF POOF
PRACTICE PRACTICE PRACTICE
PRESENTS
PRISCILLA THE HUN
PRO WRESTLER OR PUPPY
PROFESSIONAL POO CHECKER
PSYCH ME OUT
PUTTING ON A SHOW
QUIPS & QUOTES
QUIPS-N-QUOTES II
REAP THE WILD WIND
RECORD KEEPING
REDNECK TANK TOP
REFEREE
REQUESTS
ROAD TRIP 2003
ROCK ON
ROLL'UM ROLL'UM
ROLLIN', ROLLIN', ROLLIN'
RUB DIRT ON IT
S-T-R-E-S-S
SANDWICHED
SAWDUST.
SCHEDULING
SCREAMING BANSHEES
SECRET AGENT
SHAGA GOOBLE SHAGA BLIP
SHANNIGANS & KID SLOBBERS
SHORT TIGHT STEPS & OTHER ODD EVENTS
SHOTS
SHOULD EVERYONE VOTE
SLEEP DEPRIVATION
SMART GOATS
SMUDGED
SNAP, CRACKLE, POP
SNATCHED BALD
SNEAKY
SONG OF THE FROG
SPIES, SECRET AGENTS, SPOOKS, AND OTHER GOATS
SSSNAKE
STAMPEDE!
STARGATE BOERS
STEAM-IRON SANDWICHES
STEP BY STEP
STICK IT WHERE
STOMPING ORANGE STRINGS
STUCK AGAIN
STUDENT ANALOGIES AND METAPHORS
STUPID IS...
SUNSHINE BOO BOO'S
SUPER HERO
SUPER SUCKERS
SUPPER AT SEVEN A.M.
SURVEY SAYS
SURVIVING KIDDING
SWASH - BUCKLING BUCKS
TAKING CARE OF BUSINESS
TALKING POCKETS
TATTOOING
THANK GOODNESS FOR MUD
THE $37.50 BUCK
THE 2003 DARWIN AWARDS
THE COWBOY WAY
THE DACHSHUND AND THE LEOPARD
THE DANGERS OF GUM BOOTS
THE FARM WOOKIE
THE FLYING GOATZANIES
THE FRAGRANCE OF HAY
THE GAME'S AFOOT
THE GOAT WHISPERER
THE MOB SQUAD
THE MORAL BUCK
THE PET CHICKEN
THE PIED PIPER
THE PLAN
THE SCARECROW GOAT SELLER
THE SMELL OF MONEY
THE TALKING GOAT
THE TARP ANNIHILATOR
THE THINKER
THE TICK
THE TRUTH ABOUT DOGS
THE V WORD
THE WINDY TAX
THE WORM HAS TURNED
THEN THE KNEE DOCTOR SAID
THIS END UP
THUMP, BANG, WHOOP, AND HOLLER
THURSDAY, THURSDAY
TIE THE ROPE TO THE HAMMER
TOO MUCH FENCE
TORNADO ALLEY
TORPEDOS AND TIDAL WAVES
TOSS THE BLOCK
TOY TRUCK
TRAINING HUMANS
TRUE LOVE
TWITCHY HANKEY
UGH DAYS
UNCLE ARTHUR
UNWITTINGLY
USING CAFFEINE WISELY
WALK LIKE A TURTLE
WALK ON THE WILD SIDE
WALK THIS WAY
WANNA BUY A GOAT (WINK, WINK, WINK)
WARNING LABLES
WAS THAT 65 OR 66?
WAS THAT CHRISTMAS?
WAS THAT THE WIND
WATER BUCKET TOAD
WAY TO THE HEART
WEANING WEANERS
WEE GOAT FARMERS
WELFARE GOATS
WHAT A DAY
WHAT DAY IS IT
WHAT'D YOU SAY?
WHATSTH THISTH
WHEN LIFE HANDS YOU VEGETABLES.
WHERE'S THE BRAKES
WHOOWEE
WIDE LOADS
WILD GOAT MILKING
WINTER LIST
WOE, DISPAIR...
WRONG.TURN!
YOU CALL HIM WHAT?
YOU COME HERE, NO, YOU COME HERE, NO…
ZAPPED!
SCREAMING BANSHEES

Time. Time can do strange things to a person. I’m talking about the lack of time. A happy, calm individual can suddenly go ballistic when they realize they are running out of time for something. I turn into what I fondly call the Screaming Banshee. Oh, I’m not screaming on the outside, I’m screaming on the inside. I picture this wild eyed, wild haired woman, running at top speed, screaming the whole way “Gotta hurry, gotta hurry“, inside me when I am running out of time.

I goat farm full time and everything, I mean everything, pertaining to goats is set up on a time schedule. Oh, the goats can blow the whole schedule out of the water any time they want, putting me behind schedule, but usually things run on a time table of what field or pen gets fed at certain times, who gets water at a certain time, who’s time is it for worming or shots, when is breeding season, when is kidding season, and then throw in bottle feeding, the schedule can get pretty crowded. If you are off by a little bit, it throws everything late and you find yourself still working at nine and ten o’clock at night and you still haven’t had supper.

But one thing I insist on is that the bottle babies get their bottles at a set time, four times a day and then they are not stressed as to when they are getting their bottles and having health issues because of the stress. My babies know when exactly they will be getting their bottles, so to them, life is good.

Yesterday morning I planned on making a quick trip over to Wal-Mart to pick up whole milk for the goat kids, a few groceries for us, and a prescription. This was one of those great $4.00 prescriptions, Mobic for arthritis, that Wal-Mart sells. Okay, so I’m a gimpy running Screaming Banshee on the inside. The pharmacy opened at 9 a.m. and timing it just right, getting the grocery shopping done just as the pharmacy opened, I knew I should be back in time to bottle feed my kids at their ten o’clock feeding. No problem.

I finished my shopping and I was right there in front of the pharmacy at a minute to 9 a.m. The people were inside their caged fronts pottering around and at 5 minutes after 9 a.m. they were still inside pottering around, ignoring me. I was barely containing myself from rattling their cage when finally a woman rolled the cage up and accepted my prescription.

“How long will it take?” I asked. I could feel the Screaming Banshee inside me start trotting in place. “Twenty minutes,” she answered and then very boredly turned away.

“What????!” my Screaming Banshee said inside me, “Twenty minutes!” my Banshee shouted, “I’m the only one here. Twenty minutes?! What have you got to do, eat breakfast back there? Oh, probably have to cook it first, too?!”

I calmed the Banshee down and thought this could work, I’ll just go check out, load everything up in the truck, and by the time I’m through, the prescription will be ready. I turned and pushed that cart at full speed, with it clacking up a storm. I don’t know about your all’s Wal-Mart’s, but I think every cart in the place is on the verge of a flat tire, if that’s possible, by the way they clack at every turn of the wheel. You know exactly where everyone is at in the store who has a cart, because you can hear every cart just clacking away.

One time I got a cart, which I didn’t notice until after I had got it fully loaded, that on the handle, under my hands was a note, carefully taped in place, “Cart Out of Order“. What? How does a cart get out of order? It either pushes or it doesn’t. And, what was it doing in with all the other carts, ready to be used? Talk about a nervous visit to Wal-Mart, wondering if my cart was going to suddenly go berserk and careen out of control.

I hurriedly pushed my clacking cart to the garden section. Why there? For some reason, early in the morning, our Wal-Mart usually only has one or two checkouts opened and they are the ones for ten or less items. The ladies at the register are usually very kind and wave me through, but the looks from the people who are hurrying to pick up one or two things before work, well, I could relate. I can recognize Screaming Banshees inside others too.

For some reason, early mornings the garden section is not busy and there is a check out person always there, though she almost faints when I appear with a cart loaded down with dog food, cat food, groceries, ten gallons of whole milk and whatever else I threw in the cart when passing. Usually I can also park the truck close to the garden section that early in the morning, not far to push the cart, particularly when it is pouring down the rain, and get things loaded into the truck.

Checked out and bags in the truck, I charged back to the pharmacy where the girl handed me my generic Mobic and I handed her $4.00. Neato, but time was a wasting and sunlight was burning, and the Screaming Banshee inside me was at full throttle, galloping in place to make the feeding time of the bottle babies.

And, did I speed on the way home? Absolutely not. I may have a Screaming Banshee inside me telling me I’m running out of time, but the tight wad, I mean frugal person, had her under control. It was the speed limit for me. Always obey the law, plus on the interstate, if not crowded, I go 55 mph because a study had come out saying we could increase our mileage by 20% if we went 55 mph. Hey, the tight wad, I mean frugal person, had that Screaming Banshee by the cuff of the neck, making her save money. I made it home in time to feed the bottle kids and they told me all was well with their world.

Then, the Screaming Banshee noticed the time and said you need to call some people back, but it was time to water the girls in the upper pasture and check them over first. Also, more things on the list to do today, so the Screaming Banshee just said …..

THE END


 

DISCLAIMER

GoatGateway.com and it's agents and sponsors are not responsible for the content of advertisers' sites or advertised claims.

GoatGateway.com does not act as an agent for buyers or sellers. GoatGateway.com does not in any way influence or control transactions for goods or services between buyers and sellers.

USE

Information on this web site is offered by persons who are NOT veterinary professionals except where noted.
The information contained on this web site is based on the knowledge and understanding of the author at the time of first publication. However, because of advances in agriculture related fields, users are reminded of their personal responsibility to ensure that information upon which they rely is up to date and to CHECK accuracy and currency of the information WITH YOUR VETERINARIAN for specific health and nutrition advice.

ALWAYS READ THE LABEL
Users of medical and chemical products must always read the label and strictly comply with directions on the label. Users are not absolved from compliance with the directions on the label by reason of any statement made, or omitted to be made, on this web site.

TRADEMARKS

The boergoats.com logo is a registered trademark of KLS Boer Goats.
The following are trademarks or service marks of KLS Boer Goats.

OnLine Show
GoatGateway
BoerGoats.com
MeatGoats.com
GoatClassifieds
ShowMeatGoats
ShowWethers.net
BoerGoat101.com
GoatBreeders.com
BoerGoats.comCHAT
The Show Wether Center
Where The Bucks Meet The Bucks
The Boer & Meat Goat Information Center